my journey with truth

Archive for the ‘people-pleasing’ Category

after a really difficult experience in telling the truth to a friend this past January, i decided to take on truth-telling for Lent.  people would ask what i was giving up (and in the end i also tried to sustain green habits through the awesome student organization Creation Matters), and they’d look at me like i was crazy when i said i was giving up lying in order to tell the truth.  but it was a pretty big deal for me – and not because usually i’m a big fat liar or pathological about it or anything.

see, i’m a people-pleaser, for one thing.  and thanks to my friend, heather, i have a better understanding of my ENFJ Myers-Briggs personality type.  it freaked me out to read (to confront) the truth about myself that “ENFJs have definite values and opinions,” but “when faced with a conflict between a strongly-held value and serving another person’s need, they are highly likely to value the other person’s needs.”  in other words, there are times ENFJs give in on things which are important to us because we want the other person to be happy.  and it’s a terribly conflicted way to live, ultimately.

so since the terrible fight with my good friend, which was a big lesson in needing to tell the truth even when it is scary and the other person might not like you or want to be your friend anymore, and since having a stranger online be able to reveal a truth about myself, i’ve been really trying to live into telling the truth.  instead of avoiding conflict with others, i’m finally trying to avoid the internal conflict i feel when i don’t quite say what i think or feel in order to make sure the other person is happy and still likes me.  crazy, right?

the more i’ve talked about it with friends and colleagues, the more i’ve realized how great my journey with truth has been so far and how much i like sharing about it truthfully with others.  so welcome to my journey with truth.



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  • myjourneywithtruth: i had it in my office at my internship in Corpus Christi two summers ago. ellen davis is brilliant and glows with an aura of holy.
  • amy h: i love this quote. i think i may need it hanging on my wall where i'll see it daily. perhaps in front of the toilet? by the door? bedside table? i'll
  • chaz: That post made me really sad too. Mostly because I want to take young Lizzie by the shoulders and shake her (gently?) into sublime realization that sh